- Curiosity wanted to kill the cat, but Chuck Norris got to it first.
- When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.
- Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic.
- Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
- There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
- Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
- Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
- Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
- Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
- Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.